A lot of people have trouble dealing with form rejections, be that for a project, a job, a book, college, or pretty much anything in this world.

Being an author, and therefore having some degree of experience in the matter, I figured it’s my duty to help people during such distressful times.

Disclaimer:  Don’t ever reply to a rejection letter. You’re better than that, bae.

So here’s  HOW TO REPLY TO A REJECTION LETTER  (you’re welcome):

Dear Sirs,

Thank you for taking the time to consider me/my ______ for your _______.  I deeply appreciate the opportunity, and respect your decision.

With that being said: Fuck you. Fuck the fuckidy you, hard in the ass, several times, and then some. Fuck you everywhere. Fuck you, fuck your cat, fuck your grandma, and fuck your cow, if you have one. I mean, who doesn’t have a cow? You don’t, obviously. 

So let me spell that for you: F U C K   Y O U. Have an awesome fucking day, you cold-hearted douche.


The person you’ll regret rejecting for the rest of your sorry life.

PS 1: Imma J.K. Rowling / Jack Canfield / Harrison Ford / Stephen Hawking yo ass someday.

PS 2: You were my second choice anyway.

PS 3: You suck monkey balls.